Unconditionally yours

un·con·di·tion·al  (nkn-dsh-nl)

adj.

Without conditions or limitations; absolute

This adjective can be used in many different ways, but today I bring it up in the context of friendship. If you are my friend, I love you this way. I may, from time to time, disagree with something you do, but I will always support your decisions. If I see you walking a destructive path, I will do my best to steer you down a different road. It might be my opinion that someone you are dating is perhaps less than good enough for you, and I may find it necessary to let you know this...once, after which I will step back and let you live your life.  I may want to say "I told you so" if said relationship does not work out, but I will try my darnest not to and hope you will forgive me if I slip, it was only because I care so deeply. I will always be there to bolster your self esteem, assure you that you are a beautiful, wonderful amazing individual that it is my honour to have as part of my life. If for some reason we end up far apart and we don't talk as often as we would both like, I will still love you. I will understand that you have a busy life, a full and engaging existance that will sometimes prevent you from tying yourself down to a phone. When we do talk it will be as if we were never separated. I will always cherish time spent together, will always wish there was more of it. When you grow I grow with you. You, my friend, have made an indelible impression on me. Thank you.

and now for resolutions...

Ahhhhhh...Christmas is done. Time to sit back, undo the top button of my pants and relax! Oh, if only this was the case.. Wedding thoughts are surging back in quickly to replace the now fleeting holiday ones.

Custom made Crayons®!

It was a fabulous Christmas though! My first one hosting, my first turkey, not to mention my little girls first one too! The day started at 7 am with gifts and  I'm sure you would all agree that there is nothing better than watching some one open a gift you chose for them, except of course, if said person is a child. So much fun watching the anticipation build, those eyes light up, that smile begin to form, and finally, that look of complete happiness! While Hailey isn't quite there yet, her brother gave me all the joy of giving I needed. One gift we purchased for Noah was the Crayola® Crayon Maker, but I think I am having more fun with it than he is! The day slowly transitioned from our presents, to presents from the Grand-folk, into an afternoon of snacks and lovely conversation, all culminating in a wonderful sit down dinner in our tiny, humble kitchen. While the dishes weren't fancy, the company was fantastic. As I sat down in my chair and  filled my wine glass, all I could think was how lucky I am to have the wonderful, amazing family I do...as well as "Thank GOD for Pinot Blanc!" I can still feel the glow from that day (and quite possibly the wine, as it was only my second drink since weaning Hailey!)

Now, as the New Year quickly approaches, I find myself once again drowning in thoughts of invitations, meal planning and making a resolution to stop eating all the damned goodies that are still hanging around the house!

You are what you attract

After reading a post from one of my fellow bloggers this evening, I can't help but find myself in total understanding. She spoke so concisely about something I truly believe. People, things and happenings in our lives exist because we attract them to us. Both positive and negative. I have always tried my best to look at things in an optimistic way. The glass is always half full for me. From every tragedy in our lives, there is knowledge to be gained and in turn made into something good for the future. Some tragedies, unfortunately, are final, but even these I tend to mourn positively...if that makes sense? I can't personally dwell on things I cannot change. Instead, I try my best to remember what it was that made this person so special to lose. I do feel pain, don't get me wrong, sometimes so much so it's physical, but mostly I reflect happily.

What understanding did I acquire then, if this was already something I practise as a basis for living? It makes perfect sense to me now why I have felt so drawn to her, why I have seen so much familiarity in the ways she goes about her family and work. I feel honoured to know her and to have been able to work with her in the past, and now in the future as we take this new step in life. I am positive her pictures will bring to life the love we have for each other and I look forward to sharing our day with her.

On a side note, I recommend the Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield...good read! (I own it if you would like to borrow ;) )

The Celestine Prophecy is a 1993 novel by James Redfield that discusses various psychological and spiritual ideas which are rooted in many ancient Eastern Traditions and New Age spirituality. The main character of the novel undertakes a journey to find and understand a series of nine spiritual insights on an ancient manuscript in Peru. The book is a first-person narrative of the narrator's spiritual awakening as he goes through a transitional period of his life

Passing on the kindness

My son never ceases to amaze me. I have spent the last nine years trying my damnedest (<----that looks dumb, I know, but that's the proper spelling!) to teach him humility, compassion and understanding. Growing up, my mother always made a point to let me know that there is always someone worse off than yourself. She didn't do it to make me feel guilty, she merely wanted me to realise that I was lucky to have what I did, even if my friends had nore. In turn I have spent my life trying my best to make sure I am always aware of how good I have it, and pass on any good will I can to those who need a helping hand.  Noah has always displayed to me a innate ability to feel compassion for those less fortunate.  In the last two weeks though, it has been shining out of him. First of all, we have new neighbours. When I informed Noah of this, he immediately suggested getting them a "welcome to the neighbourhood" gift. (we have yet to do this, but this is my fault, not his) Next example, while admiring his gingerbread house this morning, he simply stated "I would really like to give this to a homeless person." WOW. Now I realise that I am tooting my own horn here, or rather Noah's, but I am so proud of my little man. While I am fully aware he is less than perfect, as we all are, and he certainly has his problem areas, as we all do, he is showing me how he is growing everyday into a wonderful, thoughtful human being.

Monday will find us at the CIBC, picking out an Angel from the Christmas tree so we can buy an age appropriate gift for a child in need. The excitement he showed when I suggested we do this was heartwarming.

So, even while he daily asks me for something new, I will try and keep in mind that he is a child, and I too felt that I needed everything at his age. Instead of getting angry, I will once again gently remind him of those with nothing and hope my mother's lesson will continue to spill into the next generation.

On a related note...I have always wanted to sponsor a child. The main reason I haven't yet is my wariness. I am worried that my money will not be going to where I intend it to. Is there anyone who has already sponsored a child and has any advice for me? 

Small pleasures

I love the smell of gingerbread, the taste of gingerbread, and who knows,one day I might even love the process of baking gingerbread! For now, I'll settle for the nice pre-made kit from my trusty grocery store! I adore doing little projects with my son, but recently I have been guilty of being too busy. I feel ashamed even saying this, I should never be too busy for my children. But with the last 6 months filled with feeding, changing, screaming, 20 min naps, repeat, I have been a little selfish with any spare time that comes my way. Don't get me wrong, I haven't been completely neglecting my boy, I just personally feel I could be spending a little more time with him before he decides I suck and wants nothing to do with me anymore. I have been accused on more than one occasion of coddling...and that may be true, but I can't help it. So tonight while daddy kept the little one occupied, I sat down with my not so little man  and we decorated the shit out of a gingerbread house! I may have not mentioned this before, but if you know me well enough, you might already know, I am a control freak! If I see something being done that I just assume I could do better, I will jump in and try to take over. This is one of my less appealing characteristics, but I am aware of it, and try very hard to control it, especially when it comes to working on things with Noah. I am always pleasantly surprised when I do manage to suppress my urge. I love watching his gears turning as he decides where to put the next little piece of candy, after he eats "just one more". Who knows, I might just have the Next Great Baker on my hands...but I should probably teach him how to bake gingerbread first ;)

Tis the season...for colds!

I'm back, mostly. Has been a long since I have been under the weather and I can honestly say, it knocked me on my fanny! I hate being sick. I try not to use the word hate very much, it's such a strong word, but when it comes to colds, I really have no qualms with dropping the H bomb. When it's a head cold, I also use a few other rather strong words to describe it, but I will spare you.

I digress, I mentioned being back, and snivelling will not help me now. I have spent most of the day trying to catch up on the things that get out of hand when you fall ill. My wonderful man stayed home from work yesterday to help me with the kids and cooked dinner, as he also did the evening prior. I can't begin to tell you how thankful I am for this. All I could think all weekend, in the midst of feeling sorry for myself, was "How am I going to do this once he goes back to work?"  I realise that women everywhere manage being sick while having to tend their children and housework all at the same time, and I sound like a big baby. I will fully admit this without shame. When I have a head cold, or any other malady of the head, I turn into a gigantic one! I am almost as pathetic as a man when they are sick... ;)

Now, only a little tickle in the back of my throat, with laundry dishes and vacuuming done, I can complain about my menial misfortune to you via my blog and perhaps garner some undeserved pity...hey, I'd do it for you ;)